Things to consider: Think of community as a term that can encompass a group, team or a place --- like your high school, hometown or home. Both essays are accompanied by an analysis of their strengths and weaknesses. If you talk about moving as though it was some big challenge to overcome, the reader will also assume you haven’t faced much adversity in your life. It wasn’t about the places in which she moved at all. Things to consider: A challenge could be personal, or something you have faced in your community or school. If so, what are they and how do they fit into your schedule? Help people see something larger than themselves? Did you work alone or with others to initiate change in your community? Does your talent or skill allow you opportunities in or outside the classroom? How did your experience change your perspective on leading others? If you end up mentioning the neighborhood in which you grew up, the size of your house, the fact that you had a great big yard as a kid, or any other seemingly minor detail, you could end up sounding like a snob. This length is perfectly appropriate assuming all of the words add substance to the narrative. Then, think about how you generated a solution. You petition as part of the student government to have some hours of support for students in the mornings. It presents a dimension of Angie's character that should appeal to the admissions staff who read her essay. -You understood something important about someone else. It can mean being a mentor to others, acting as the person in charge of a specific task, or taking the lead role in organizing an event or project. What does it allow you to do? UC Berkeley: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC Irvine: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC Riverside: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC San Diego: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC Davis: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC Merced: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, UC Santa Cruz: Acceptance Rate and Admissions Statistics, strategy for responding to the UC Personal Insight questions, Ph.D., English, University of Pennsylvania, M.A., English, University of Pennsylvania, B.S., Materials Science & Engineering and Literature, MIT. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time. What kinds of things does the subject bring to your life outside the classroom? Did you lead a team? Similarly, writing an essay about moving can miss the mark. Tagged: college admissions essay, college essays, college essay, common app essay. This essay is not the appropriate platform. By the time she was 14 she had moved to Australia, New Zealand, Thailand, Hong Kong, New Jersey, and New York City. Bring the reader into the scene and explain how leadership works in it. Another thing to think about is how the educational system you are in creates barriers and how that system works. Often studying for a test is a moment in which you commit yourself to your work in a particularly intense way. How does your creativity influence your decisions inside or outside the classroom? Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem-solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Many of the UC personal insight essay examples I’ve shown you do … You can do this either before or after reading the prompts. This is creative work. How could you tell something needed fixing? For example, you read about industrialization or deindustrialization in your economics class and you recognize something about the city you live in, why the factory space a are now empty, or the farmland is now a mall. When it comes to the features of a good application essay, Terrance does well and avoids common pitfalls. Does your creativity relate to your major or future career? It was all about her, and ultimately, the traits she developed to maintain consistency in her life. You helped your siblings get things done to put less of a burden on your caretakers. The admissions officers are evaluating you as a whole person, not just as numerical data related to test scores and grades (although both are important). How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time? This is the format of the free writes are 5 minutes each: Write for 5 minutes without stopping. What have you not shared with us that will highlight a skill, talent, challenge or opportunity that you think will help us know you better? Essays are supposed to demonstrate growth. Things to consider: A leadership role can mean more than just a title. But the problem is, this topic is sometimes too obvious. Think of each essay as an independent entity, as well as one piece of a four-essay application. Discuss how your interest in the subject developed and describe any experience you have had inside and outside the classroom --- such as volunteer work, internships, employment, summer programs, participation in student organizations and/or clubs --- and what you have gained from your involvement.